I’m very hard to let people in and when I do it’s very few I feel truly know me and who I am and what i stand for . The thing is I don’t ever ask for much but i get so very little . So I put less into people so they don’t disappoint me with expectations I thought I should get . Have you ever heard the phrase “ give credit when credit is due “. Here is a post dedicated to just that phrase .
So I won’t say the exact situation that went into place but I will give an example on how I felt . Have you ever felt you deserved credit for something and you put your all in that person because you believed in them and not just them but what they can produce . You believed that with a little push encouragement and motivation they will flourish only hoping to give you credit in the end of the fight . Or at at least appreciate the effort put into making them succeed .
But when the person gets or gains happiness over the things you helped them perfectly imperfect and now they have the confidence they need and your not the first person they call . Yes this can even happen with significant others and that could really hit you hard over the reality they put their friend , mama or friends before you when they didn’t encourage you to get them where they needed to go . Instead they belittled , undermined , and told them they wouldn’t ever be able to do what they just accomplished. Well yea in feeling pretty hurt because that just happened to me.
How could you betray the thought of someone helping you succeed because they believed in you . And I wasn’t the first person you wanted to call or tell to share the excitement with you. It kind of broke my spirit a little bit and how can I be honest to you by just saying the words I’m happy for you . Because reality is I can’t truly be happy for you untill you tell me how happy you are to have someone like me by the side or standing on the front line cheering you on . Helping you in the time you needed me and i gave you my energy time and pieces of me to help you . I just wish I could get some credit i feel I deeply deserve it . I deserve to be given the credit and appreciated for the times I helped you build confidence and lift you off your feet . But when I am not i am left to feel like this used up , unappreciated, overlooked and not good enough to be given the credit when i put the work in .