Stuck and I don’t like you very much why am I here? I’m graduating college in a matter of three months and I’m gaining a degree in the human service field in hopes of becoming a PPW ( public personal worker) that won’t come into action until I gain my masters next year but let me tell you I’m getting the hell out of teaching. But I’m currently job searching and I’m really having no good luck in finding jobs aligning in the human service field. UNIVERSE DONT FAIL ME! GOD DONT LEAVE ME
Have you ever been in a job/career you desperately wanted out of well that’s how I’m feeling right now. Don’t get me wrong I love the children and it’s never the children who stray me away but being a teacher is a thankless job and a job that drains you from taking on the stress of some of the parents/families who expect you to do everything for their child. Sure I can save their test score, grades, control their eating but guess what I can’t raise them or discipline them for they are not my own. I feel as if Iever want any good chance of wanting mutiple children I cant teach anymore! Nutcase is what you would be especially because I would like to have between 2-4!I would not call myself a selfish person but I will say I love time for myself it is important, to be able to have that commitment to myself. But sometimes you need to be selfish for yourself and that means doing things only for you because you need to do things for you for the safety of your own well being. I struggle with doing things for myself because I am so willingly eager to help someone else but how is this acceptable or excepting to help other people is my weakness.
I want to be happy in the career and not feel as if it is an obligation I aspire to love what I do and how I do it and I want to impact the lives of other people in ways others can’t because I have the gift. In high school, I knew I had to attend school so I could reach my goal of obtaining my diploma. I had no idea of what I wanted my profession to be in after I graduated from high school. One of my hardest experiences in life so far was trying to figure out just what was my calling in life better yet my purpose. From a very early age, I knew I had a special gift with working with all types of children. I love children and my whole life I have been told I work very well with babies and small children with developmental disabilities of various ages. My first initial thought in a profession with babies was becoming a neonatal nurse. This type of profession would satisfy my desire to work with children, but the intensity of the nursing program was so much more demanding and less rewarding then I had anticipated so I dropped out.
So then I followed my gut with teaching thinking I would be this perfect first grade teacher with an apple on my desk and my personalized coffee mug filled with coffee everyday greeting students in the hallways. Listen hell no I sure woke up quickly when a parent blamed me for failing rather demoting their child because of lack of turned in work what they didn’t realize is I didn’t fail your child you did.. You failed to seem interested in your child’s wellbeing managing to miss every SINGLE parent teacher conference, ignoring calls & texts, pta meetings, field trips, and numerous letters I sent home, extra hours I put in to tutor and incomplete assignments you failed your child but it’s my fault because I’m the teacher. Yet as the teacher I am blamed for just doing my job and I didn’t just do my job I took pride in it by always picking up children who failed to have lack of support but that type of teacher will burn you out quick and that exactly what happened to my drive for teaching. But I made a commitment to myself this time that I will put myself first and take care of me before I decide to take on anybody else’s problems and so far I have held up to that responsibility and I am holding myself accountable for my actions and for my word. So I silence my thoughts take deep breaths and eliminate as much stress as I can.
Lastly in a burnout driven career you need time to unwind and process what’s going on, so it’s crucial for one to take time just to do something they love. “Just because you’re a superwoman doesn’t mean you have to function like one 24/7. So where I am now in hopes of scoring my dream job that will finally soothe that itch I have been dying to scratch. No disrespect to any of the teachers out there I totally respect the hell out of what you do for it is what I do I am a teacher. Once a teacher always a teacher but I crave and desire more so I’m calling it quits! Thank the teachers, educators and aspiring teachers for what you will embark on is a life’s journey of never fulfilling another parents requests but filled with some children you love and some children your glad they are not yours! Return to sender lol!