Friendships ?

What’s the meaning of friendship ?

I had a friend tell me once I was selfish , and that I always put my boyfriend before my Friends but is that true? Maybe sometimes because he is my best friend and when I didn’t have any friends that cared about me the way I did he made sure I was ok. He nursed me back to health in the hospital, every single doctors appointment! He was there when I was fragile and it was him that picked up my pieces !

I had a best friend that I met when i was fourteen since day one we were totally in sync with each other untill she got pregnant the year of our senior year of high school . I was seventeen and devastated and couldn’t understand what was going on and there was no way I could of been there for her the way I wanted to because I was afraid to be . How could you be a mother at seventeen? I had so many questions and then she started to put her boyfriend before me and slowly faded me out leading up to her conceiving her first child .

How can I support you as a friend so we fell off and it started off slowly and ended fast . But then her boyfriend and her family broke up and we became some what close again but never the same as before she had her first child that broke our friendship. I loved her , conversations , hanging out , talking on the phone all day , and simply having a friend !

You outgrow friends , people you love and you move on with life if I stayed in one spot I couldn’t possibly grow as an adult I would want to be . But women get attached to other women when it’s Friendship it’s more of a sisterhood . When you break away from that person it’s never the same . Women care to much , so sensitive, brag on the things they have , love to tell secrets , and always want relationship advice . But what I won’t do is take relationship advice from someone who doesn’t have a man or know or understand how to keep one and its more than just sex !

When I become friends with someone I connect spiritually and kind of a connect that makes me wonder why do I love so hard to people and everything around me. I have never had a friend who I feel has had my back the way my current best friend of four years have. Women tend to be catty and then messy and as you can tell I don’t like conflict but I will put you in your place when your out of line. When you search for a friend or become friends when a new person you look for characteristics as yourself then you start to want someone who will motivate you and be by your side good and bad no matter what . The number one rule is not be judged and that’s all anyone wants to not be judged you want your friend to live you for who you are and not what you can do for them .

I have had women use me to get to men and use me period and throw me away like a used napkin . That’s why I stepped away from being so friendly to women because they are backstabbers when it isn’t sincere which sucks . No longer will I allow a so called friend try to tell me about myself . Look I’m human and want to be treated as such and this year I cut the small circle of friends I have in half so I had to come to terms with that . That’s ok I don’t want anyone pretending to be my friend I only want someone around me who is happy for my growth , spirit and love to be around my presence so I wish you well to all the friends I let go . It’s your loss and frankly I don’t care you hurt my feelings and tried to break me as a woman I’m growing to be and that’s my territory so fuck you ! 2018 I am going to be fishing for positive friends only and unique people who stand out from the rest ! That’s who belongs with me the people who are different and cling to me as the natural friend I make people feel good about there selves ! 2018 is the year i gain new friends , new social groups , new clubs and then new fresh start with a new career !

Signing off


2 Comments Add yours

  1. I really like this post, I feel like it is very raw and real. I also totally understand what you mean about women and girls being catty, sometimes, it just seems easier to be friends with guys… I hope the new year is well for you!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you it’s so true ! Friends get jealous and then bring you down which meant that you were not my friend from the start ! You used me to get what you needed to move on ! Thank you ! Cheers to finding new friends !

      Liked by 1 person

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